


Can you F***ing not?

by Dreamer372



Series: Rants [1]
Category: Original Work
Genre: Angry rant, Angst, Can you not report this, Family, Feel my anger instead, I have two younger siblings, I swear, I'm PISSED, I'm just angry that he ALWAYS DOES THIS, I'm the oldest, Moving Away, Please Don't Cry, So kindly fuck off, dear dad, he's not abusive, maybe triggering?, stop moving us around, this is BULLSHIT
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-02
Updated: 2019-06-02
Packaged: 2020-04-06 09:29:32
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,006
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19059895
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dreamer372/pseuds/Dreamer372
Summary: A rant or some work bulls*** cuz I'm angry and need to rant. I don't want to move.





	Can you F***ing not?

You say it's for a good reason.

I get that, I really do, but...

I don't.

It's not that you've explained it weird, it's just... I don't fucking get it that you have to up-end us, especially after you said this was the last time.

But you always say that. 

Why do I keep falling for it?

I wouldn't be so mad if we were moving somewhere close, that we could still have the same friend group, but are aren't, so I need to 'get over it'.

Why?

I get it.

It'll pay more.

It's closer to family (not that we'd spend any time with them anyway. At least I won't. (PS, Mom hates them as much as I do (Sorry, Dad, but they're really exhausting)).

They need someone with my skill-set over there.

I get it.

I do.

But if it pays more, when will enough be enough?

~~Money can be measured. Happiness can't, apparently.~~

You'll be at your siblings' throats before you know it.

~~What do you expect? They're family and not seeing them very often gives the excuse to not bring up controversial topics.~~

Then why do they only need your skill-set for only a year or two?

~~At that point, leave us somewhere and come back every few months. That's how it goes during the moves anyway.~~

You do understand the only thing that's been keeping us sane through the years- actually, that's a  ** _FUCKING LIE_** and you KNOW it. We pretend we're fine, but we gave up a while ago. You just don't see it- you don't  _want_ to see it. Your oldest has separation anxiety, I swear. Your middle has territorial issues. Your youngest has managed to go a great deal of their life not remembering the first three moves.

I, the oldest, have been through eight moves.

No, we are not military, despite what you may think.

The middle child has been through seven.

That, oddly, or not, given the thought, is people's first thought.

The youngest has been through four... or five, coming up. I've lost track, honestly.

(They got lucky. They were about four when we got to the third to last... until this point. It'll be fourth to last soon)

I remember the last... four or five. But not six. You see, that's the thing I'm angry about.

It's not quite about the move itself.

I'm angry over the reasons, the broken promises, and the result.

You see, dear reader, my father had been told by a friend about his dream job.

I get it.

It's the job you've always wanted,  _dreamed_ of.

You, of course, applied. You talked about it, but I don't think you truly listened to us.

We said we were ok with it, at first.

(We weren't. It hadn't hit yet)

But then, we protested.

You still had a chance to take it back.

(You didn't)

You didn't  _need_ to take this job.

(Any reasons other than that and more money

(I think we would have been  _fine_ )

have not been shared with us)

But you did.

Every time, time and time again, you promised.

You

_PROMISED_

That this time would be the last.

(We actually believed you this time)

(We should have known better)

You promised that this would be the last time.

(It never was)

You built Mom that fancy bed.

You know.

The one you said couldn't be taken out of the room.

But I guess, it can be.

You just have to be desperate enough.

It was supposed to be there for thirty years.

Until your youngest was out of the house and you could  _finally_ retire.

But I get it.

I do.

You can't predict the future.

Things happen.

But stop making the same promise if it keeps getting broken.

That is what Einstein apparently said, right?

Something like doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results?

I guess that applies to us too.

You promised.

It got broken.

We expected next time to be different.

(It wasn't)

But this time, things are different.

And no, it's not that fact you're moving us across the country again.

You've already done that.

It's the fact you're splitting us up.

We managed to get through it every time.

Without you.

Together.

The mother who has to deal with her right hand with separation issues, the angry one with territorial problems, and the innocent one who still talks to friends from two moves ago and doesn't get attached to people anymore.

(They learned. The older two should have learned, but we didn't.)

You were off at the next place, 'getting ready'.

I get it.

I do.

You wanted us to be able to get settled in quickly.

So you go there, months in advance and leave us to deal with the fallout.

I get it.

I do.

You have a new job to work at.

But this time, things are different.

You  _SAID_ that I could live at home instead of live on campus for college.

I get it.

I have to 'grow up' already.

Dad.

You  ** _FUCKING MORON._**

You don't get it, do you?

I got even more attached to this house, know-

No

Thinking I was going to live here until I got up on my feet for real.

McDonalds isn't going to support me.

Mom feels super guilty and told me to accept any money she sends down. 

She said it's her way of easing a guilty concious.

Of leaving us behind.

She knows that someone who can't even  _drink yet_ , who is barely an adult  _shouldn't be left alone_. 

You will be two days away.

You are leaving your oldest and middle child.

Two

days

away.

I get it.

I do.

We have college to attend.

You have a job

~~That you didn't have to take.~~

But it would be easiest for everyone, right?

You're  ** _SPLITTING US UP, WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU?!_**

But I get it.

Question is:

Do you?

So all in all, Dad:

Can you  ** _FUCKING NOT?!_**


End file.
